Today's guest is someone I fell in platonic love with by reading her work. Julia Samuel is one of the country's leading psychotherapists but she is also well-known as an author. Her first book, Grief Works, was a Sunday Times bestseller and is routinely cited as one of the most helpful and compassionate books on bereavement you will ever read. Her second book, This Too Shall Pass, Stories of Change, Crisis and Hopeful Beginnings, was published just before lockdown and could not have been a more insightful guide to the uncertain times we all found ourselves in. Adwoa Aboah called it 'one of the most valuable books I've ever read', while my hero Esther Perel, said it was 'a remarkable portrayal of how we need to understand ourselves to truly heal'.
She joins me to talk about failing exams, failed jobs, her self-perceived failures as a mother and the impossibility of putting our emotions through a logical system. We also touch on imposter syndrome, quitting things you aren't good at, being a twin (she is one!), her close friendship with the late Princess Diana (plus what kind of godmother she is to Prince George) as well as the discomfort she feels talking about herself, rather than being the one to ask questions of a client.
I am so honoured to have Julia on the podcast. Her integrity and intelligence, forged through 30 years as a working therapist, shine through absolutely everything she does. Her work has been crucially important to me personally and I'm sure it will be to you too.
As Julia says: 'We are brought up thinking life is an upward journey, a stairway to a better place, each step higher than the last. but the reality is far less certain: there are ups and downs, and the only certainty that exists is that there will be change.'
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Julia's latest book, This Too Shall Pass, is out now and available to order here.
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I've written a new book! Failosophy: A Handbook For When Things Go Wrong is out in October. It's a practical, inspirational and reassuring guide to the seven principles of failure I've developed since doing this podcast. Packed full of contributions from loads of former guests, as well as listener stories, it is also beautifully illustrated by Paul Blow and I would love it if you wanted to pre-order a signed copy here.
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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is hosted by Elizabeth Day, produced by Naomi Mantin and Chris Sharp. We love hearing from you! To contact us, email howtofailpod@gmail.com
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Social Media:
Elizabeth Day @elizabday
Julia Samuel @juliasamuelmbe
How To Fail @howtofailpod
TWIXMAS BONUS EPISODE! How To Fail: Clemency Burton-Hill
How to Fail: A Christmas Message 2021
S12, BONUS EPISODE How to Fail: Holly Willoughby
S12, Ep8 How to Fail: Meg Mason
S12, Ep7 How to Fail: Lady Hale
S12, Ep6 How to Fail: Stanley Tucci
S12, Ep 5 How to Fail: Ruby Tandoh
S12, Ep3 How to Fail: Phil Wang
S12, Ep2 How to Fail: Jacqueline Wilson
BONUS EPISODE! How to Fail: Tanya Reynolds
S12, Ep1 How to Fail: Derren Brown
S11, BONUS EPISODE How to Fail: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
S11, Ep8 How to Fail: Maggie O'Farrell
BONUS EPISODE: HEERRREE'S DOLLY!
S11, Ep7 How to Fail: Martine Wright
S11, Ep6 How to Fail: Paris Lees
S11, Ep5 How to Fail: Christie Watson
S11, Ep4 How to Fail: Guvna B
S11, Ep3 How to Fail: Ed Miliband
S11, Ep2 How to Fail: Jessica Ennis-Hill
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